As much as I've been looking forward to the whole birthday party thing, I kinda just want to take a nap and not have to worry about doing anything for the rest of the day. My family is coming over in an hour, but knowing them it'll be more like 30-45 minutes. Time means nothing to them, and if you're early, you're on time. If you're on time, you're late, and if you're late, you're the Dunns!

Yaaaaasssssss

I finished my homework homework by 2:00 so all I have left to do is study!!!!!

Later this afternoon my family is coming over to celebrate my birthday (one month late, of course!). It's gotten to be so long since my birthday was supposed to happen that I can't even remember what I wanted for my birthday! I guess that means that I can't be disappointed too much!

I did discover that I'm pretty great at making balloon animals, too!

Last Night

I did end up going to the show last night thankfully! I took my sweet time driving in because NOTHING WAS FREAKING PLOWED but I did manage to make it to the venue alive! Once I got there, I helped with decorating and setting up for the show. We usually have about 100 people that come to the anniversary show, but because of the snowstorm only 25 people came. Dylan came, and after the show we went to Steak & Shake. I got some french fries and then went to my grandparents' house for the night! Overall, it was a great time and I wouldn't have traded it for anything.

HUGE NEWS!!!!!!!

I MAY GET TO WORK ON A MOVIE THIS SUMMER AS A PRODUCTION ASSISTANT AND AS AN ACTRESS THIS IS FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!

The only thing is, I have to talk it out with my parents. I don't see why they'd say no, but there's always that chance...

Ugggggggghhh I don't want to do anything!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today I'm going to try to be much more optimistic about things. Sleeping did me well, so I'm just going to keep trying to get back into the spirit of things. I mean my improv troupe's anniversary show is tonight! And regardless of the weather my mom needs to let me go since I'll be performing AND I need to decorate. I may sleep over at my grandparents' house in Akron though if the weather is too bad after the show. Nonetheless, that's an exciting thing and I'm greatly looking forward to it!

Goodnight, I guess

Peace out from your favorite anthropomorphic garbage can
~Emily

Do you ever just sit and think about all of your failures and painfully recollect the moment when you knew you were a worthless piece of human trash and wasted potential? Because same...

My earlier outburst...

Obviously I was having a pretty excellent night before my last post, so I'm sure you're wondering what happened.

Remember how a month ago I had turned in a scholarship application for DePaul? Well, a bunch of people posted on the DePaul Facebook page about how they had gotten emails informing them that they were finalists and would be selected for an interview with DePaul for the scholarship. So far, I've gotten nothing. I was incredibly upset at that moment because: 

1. People shouldn't have been bragging about that over Facebook in front of everybody who obviously would not be getting an interview.
2. I had worked SO SO HARD on that application; it was PRISTINE! Plus, I have so many different leadership experiences under my belt! I'm the President of a club, I've been the secretary of another, I've got varsity letters for Athletic Training, I've been on the editorial board of my school newspaper ever since I started there and I'm the GOD DAMN EDITOR IN CHIEF so I am essentially the head of my school's press! I've been with the National Youth Leadership Foundation's Envision program, and I was selected among my peers as their leader while I was there! And these are the kids who are hardcore and ambitious, dedicated and driven, and they chose ME as their leader...
3. One of the girls who was bragging about getting an interview had previously posted about procrastinating on the scholarship application in the first place! She said something along the lines of "Whew just barely managed to make the midnight deadline anybody else with me?" with some emojis after turning it in. It just disgusts me overall that someone who procrastinated and probably didn't work nearly as hard is so happily flaunting it about.
4. When these things happen to me (and they happen all the time, I'm never good enough for anything) it makes me reevaluate my worth as a person and really tears me apart.

I had been temporarily cheered up by one of my friend's who is going to DePaul next year telling me that they are going to be letting people know if they are finalists all the way to the end of the month, so there's some hope for me. But then, my sister ruined the good mood.

My sister doesn't believe in me at all. When I tried to tell her about how I was feeling, she just berated me, told me I was being over-dramatic, told me that I'm not that special, and all this other stuff. I couldn't take it anymore and just cried. I'm still crying, to be honest. I always support her in ALL of her endeavors, even if I don't support the reasons behind them or the beliefs backing them up. She's my sister, and I love her, so I support her because that's what good sisters do. But she never does the same thing for me. Honestly she treats me like dirt and I'm sick of it.

God I feel like shit.

I FREAKING LOVE BEING REMINDED OF MY OWN MEDIOCRITY WOOHOO!!!!!

2/20/15

Today I was pretty productive! I never want to see another pair of scissors again after all that I did with making flags and cutting up tee shirts for a quilt my mom is making! I made soup, didn't really get a chance to blog at all because my sister was hogging the computer, but that's okay since I'm here now! Tonight I'm going to be washing dishes, working out again, and then heading back into the world of Netflix documentaries and knitting!

Goodnight!!!

I managed to get around to working out tonight, which was pretty great!!! I basically accomplished everything I had set out to do today except for making the decorations for my show on Saturday.

I love having my room extra clean! My sister says that it's still gross and messy, but honestly this is the best shape that it's been in since I got in in the first place. I've cleared out soooo much stuff, it's incredible! It amazes me how many stupid, useless things I was holding on to without even thinking about it. I can hardly believe it!

I feel so productive!!!!

I cleared out a ton of stuff from my closet so now I have soooo much more space and it's much cleaner!!! I've made a ton of progress there! Since I don't have school today or tomorrow, I'm going to work out more and work on decorations for my show Saturday. I'll keep cleaning things in my room as I see fit, as well!

YAAAASSSSS NO SCHOOL TOMORROW EITHER YAAAAAASSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

Ahhhh I don't really have any homework for today so I'm in pretty good shape already!!!!

Cold Day

I kinda crashed out last night!!!! Today I have to be pretty productive, though. I need to make some decorations for the anniversary show on Saturday, I need to finish reading Frankenstein, I need to exercise (a LOT), I need to do whatever homework teachers decide to give on this lovely cold day, and I need to clean out my closet and continue to clean up my room! It's a daunting list, but I think I can handle doing it all.

On the bright side, I'm definitely going to improv tonight so I'm happy about that!

We STILL haven't called off school yet....

THE FACEBOOK PURGE IS BASICALLY COMPLETE!!!!

I went through my friend list and deleted all the people who were one or more of the following:

1.) Annoying

2.) I don't care to talk to/stay in touch with

3.) I don't know why I added them in the first place

4.) I will most likely never see again, and don't mind the fact that I won't see them again

I went from over 600 friends to around 325! It was kinda fun to clean it out, to be honest. After graduation I'll definitely go through again and weed out more people that I don't particularly care for. I recommend that everyone do this every once in a while!

We might  have the next two days off school because of the crazy winter weather! Two of the area schools called off for the week already, so there's a pretty solid chance that it'll happen. We're definitely getting one day, there's no way that we won't! I am really pumped for this, because I definitely need some rest.

Ash Wednesday

Today is the beginning of the Lenten season for all the Catholics out there, which included my school having a long, dull mass. The boy next to me fell asleep and it was kinda precious, so I let him keep sleeping until his friend woke him up. It's been an incredibly dull day overall, and I just want to go back to bed.